(I've Been) Datin' yer daughter

Well, she's thurteen but I love her still. The furst time I saw hur my hart stood still. And nuthin' you can do cood take hur away. My frendz they all may laff at me and the old prudes they may chastize me but I'm prowd to lift my hed and say "I've bin datin yer dotter!! You may have had her but now I got her!!"

Well, let me recunfurm yer fears. I've bin buyin hur tuns uv beers we drink em all and go see all age showz. Then we go out after kurfyu time we go downtown, commit some crimes then we cliym into bed & take off our cloze.

Pardon me if this offendz, yer dotter and I are more than frendz. I fall apart ever time she pecks my cheek. If they haul me off fer bein' wickid, I'll get it dropped to a speedin ticket. 22 in a 13 so to speak.